“I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and incur my own abhorrence.”     Frederick Douglass

North Carolinians go to the polls today to vote for or against Amendment One.   It’s a contentious piece of legislation with strong feelings on both sides.  Will North Carolina go beyond its already-existing ban on gay marriage by making marriage between a man and a woman “the only domestic legal union” recognized in the state?  By the time most people read this post, we will know the answer to this question.  The social implications are extraordinary, as many protections for unmarried partners, such as domestic violence protection, child custody, visitation rights, and more will be lost – protections that couples (by any definition) and children have come to expect.

In January of this year, I wrote a blog called “Got Integrity?” in which I discussed the importance of standing up for one’s opinions and values.  I received more feedback on that blog than on any other I have written.  It apparently touched the truth for many of my readers.

“If we believe a thing to be bad, and if we have a right to prevent it, it is our duty to try to prevent it and damn the consequences.”    Lord Milner

Today, I was gifted with a letter from a businesswoman in North Carolina – sent to all her customers and clients.  She took a huge risk in sending this letter about Amendment One, as it is likely that at least some of her customers would be voting FOR this piece of legislation, and she is thus risking their business and goodwill.  But, clearly, integrity is solidly placed among her values, and it speaks loudly in her letter.  Here it is, reprinted with her permission.  (Please note that the opinions expressed are Heather’s own, and may not represent those of other employees in her organization.)

 “Dear Friends,

 I have never before used this forum for expressing my political opinions, and indeed I hesitate to do so now.  But the more I think about the implications the passage of Amendment One could have on our beautiful state, the more I am convinced to speak.  Chinese Medicine is about restoring integrity, about moving toward balance.  I believe that a society moves closer to wholeness the more it is willing to recognize the contributions of all its members.  And it is a central tenet of Stillpoint’s philosophy that each person has a unique and significant gift to share.

 This is why, regardless of your stand on gay marriage, I am writing to urge you to vote AGAINST Amendment One today.  If this amendment fails, nothing will change.  Gay and lesbian couples in NC will still not be allowed to marry.  Our state laws already prevent this.  Some people who support the amendment believe that they are simply protecting the institution of marriage, but this amendment does more than that.  It would prevent any legal recognition of any unmarried relationship such as civil unions.  It could even deny legal protections and health insurance benefits to unwed heterosexual couples and their children.

 If this amendment passes, real people could be harmed.  There are several city and county governments (including Guilford County) that provide domestic partner benefits to the families of their employees.  If Amendment One passes, local governments would no longer be able to provide those benefits.  Hundreds of adults and children currently covered by health insurance would lose that coverage.

 Symbolically, passing this amendment is like saying to some members of our community: “You are not worthy.  We don’t want you here.”  Passing this amendment will tell our children who may be struggling with issues of sexuality: “You are not OK.  Stay silent.”  When people have to spend their time and energy hiding who they are, the community at large is deprived of the wealth of talent they might otherwise offer.  As a business owner, I know that the economy of NC will surely benefit from policies that open doors to people rather than close them.

 Please understand.  If we were voting on some expansion of rights… if we were voting only to make gay marriage legal in this state… I would not be sending this plea.  I would simply go vote privately.  But the level of misunderstanding surrounding this amendment, coupled with the amount of harm I think it could do to our community, impels me to speak out.  Thank you for listening.”  

Heather McIver

Heather, I could not have said it better or with more integrity.  And, for the record, I stand with you – as an individual, as a business owner, as a concerned citizen — because I can’t stand with you in only one capacity.   As Russell Palmer so aptly states, “we need to stress that personal integrity is as important as executive skill in business dealings.”  And so it is.

If Amendment One passes, I feel that this state will have taken a huge step backwards – to a time of explicit bigotry and discrimination.  Remember Jim Crow?  We – and our children – deserve better.  I am appalled that equal protection for all is under attack here.

“Childhood is the world of miracle or of magic: it is as if creation rose luminously out of the night, all new and fresh and astonishing.”                                     Eugene Ionesco

Sounds about right – but not for the thousands of children in the United States who are victims of child sex trafficking.  Their childhoods have been stolen and, if these victims are ever rescued, their lives will never be the same.  Deep physical and emotional trauma heal slowly; and, for some, never.

To put the issue in perspective, here are a few facts about child sex trafficking.

• According to UNICEF, every two minutes a child is being prepared for sexual exploitation.
• The average age of entry into the sex slave industry in the U.S. is 12 to 14.
• Girls as young as 5 years old are being controlled by pimps and forced to perform sexual acts.
• One child will typically earn, for her pimp, $1,200 on a weekend night.
• In the U.S., there are fewer than 150 beds available for all rescued victims of human trafficking, and they are not specifically for children.
• As many as 2.8 million children run away each year in the U.S.
• One third of all homeless children will be picked up by a pimp and sold within the first 48 hours of becoming homeless.
• Precise numbers are not easy to find, but current estimates suggest that as many as 300,000 children in the U.S. are at risk EVERY YEAR for commercial sexual exploitation.
• Child pornography is one of the fastest growing crimes in the U.S.  There has been a 2,500% increase in arrests over the past 10 years.
• The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, which helps to identify and locate children in pornography photos and videos, says its staff reviewed more than 10.5 MILLION images in 2009 (and the numbers increase every year).  In 2010, the number of reports on its cyber tip line was over 160,000, with the vast majority being from child pornography.

Laws against this crime exist in all 50 states and in Washington D.C., but they are rarely enacted, and are often widely misunderstood.  The reality is that

• There is no such thing as “child prostitution.”
• Minors cannot “choose” to be sex workers; they are enslaved.  Most are involved in pimp-controlled, coercive situations.  All are victims.

What can we do?  We can report suspected cases of child trafficking/exploitation.  Contact the police, the National Human Trafficking Hotline – 1 888 373 7888 – or the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children’s Hotline – 1 800 843 5678.  Do NOT attempt to rescue a victim yourself.

What should we be looking for?

• Evidence of being controlled
• Inability to move or leave a job
• Bruises or other signs of physical abuse
• Fear or depression
• No passport or other form of ID
• Unexplained absences from school
• Chronically runs away from home
• Appears to be hungry and/or inappropriately dressed
• Shows signs of drug addiction
• Sudden change in attire, behavior, or material possessions (suddenly has lots of expensive items)
• Has a “boyfriend” who is substantially older
• Makes references to sexual situations or to terminology of the commercial sex industry that are beyond age appropriateness

 What else can we do?

• Pray for the victims.
• Financially support the organizations that are working to eradicate this crime, and those that are providing services to rescued victims.
• Advocate by partnering with an anti-trafficking organization.
• Write to your lawmakers.  Tell them we need stricter laws and more substantial consequences for pimps and the customers of sexually exploited children.

     Help any way you can – BECAUSE NO ONE SHOULD BE FOR SALE.

Please share this with others.  Increasing awareness of the issue is one of the most important things we can do.  And it IS vitally important, BECAUSE NO ONE SHOULD BE FOR SALE.

Greetings!
Sometimes when we hear the words “human trafficking” we often find ourselves disconnected from the issue, from the numbing statistics. However, what would happen if we began to open our eyes to what is going on in our own backyards? In order to bring the issue of human trafficking a little closer to home, this newsletter focuses on the issue specifically in North Carolina. An estimated 2,200 children are homeless in North Carolina alone and 1 in 3 are trafficked within 48 hours of becoming homeless. In order to help put a face with those numbers, we’d like to share the story of Liz* who was born and raised right here in North Carolina.
Raped as a young child by her mother’s boyfriends, Liz’s childhood held little hope for a bright and successful future. As her mom began prostituting to support her drug addiction, Liz was introduced to the painful realities of prostitution herself. Liz was brought along to jobs beginning at age 11, taught about the world of prostitution and began soliciting to make enough money to pay the bills and buy food, priorities overlooked by her mother caught up in her own addictions. After being sold for 2 years, Liz entered the foster care system at age 13. Liz was in and out of foster homes until she was eventually kicked out of the system at age 18, forced to fend for herself. After having a child at 19, being arrested on multiple drug and theft charges, and serving several jail sentences, Liz continues to struggle to provide for her daughter and herself, forcing her to return to what she knew best as a means of provision: prostitution, illegal drug activity, and theft.

What would Liz’s life look like if a place for healing and restoration, like Emma’s Home, had been provided to her? Would the outcome be different? Would her future hold more hope? Would her daughter be saved from seeing the same fate she did?

We currently have three months left before we open the doors to our first safe home, Emma’s Home, and offer hope to girls like Liz. Help us provide a safe place of healing and restoration by becoming a Founding Member of Transforming Hope Ministries. By committing to give just $50 a month, you can offer hope to victims of human trafficking.

THANK YOU to newhope church, Annice F., Elizabeth B., Fabricio & Emily B., and Sean & Kristy Y. for joining the Founding Members! Join them by signing up today and begin making a difference in the life of a girl like Liz.

Blessings,

Abbi Tenaglia
Founder/Director

*Name has been changed

Children in Boat School

Boat School Outside of Phnom Penh

Slowly I regained my composure.  The teacher went on to say that, when young girls of 9 or 10 years of age don’t return to school at the beginning of the new school year, it is quite likely that they have been sold.  And the prettier the child, the more likely this is.  Generally the family will be able to eat for as long as year with the payment they receive.  And, yes, parents typically realize that the child will, in all likelihood, end up in a brothel.  But there are other mouths to feed – families with five or six children are the norm here.

But this isn’t a story only about Cambodia.  Approximately 27 million people are enslaved worldwide, up to 80% are women and children trafficked into the sex trade.  Even wealthy countries have areas of poverty, and these areas are prime targets for traffickers.  Poverty engenders vulnerability.  Eager for a means of escape, it’s easier to be tricked into believing someone’s promise of work and a better life.

Children in School

Given that billions of people in the world — one quarter of the world’s population – live in extreme poverty, it becomes easier to understand how high the risk is of being trafficked, and why the estimated number of trafficked persons is in the millions.  So, in fighting poverty, we are also reducing human trafficking.  There are thousands of ways to work to reduce poverty.  Just do a Google search on the subject and pick one.  Ending poverty IS possible, but we must all work together if we are to be successful.

What else can you do?  Educate yourself and others about human trafficking.  Awareness is crucial.  Organizations like the Polaris Project have websites that are loaded with resources for this purpose.

When you shop, please consider fair trade products.  It is estimated that if each person bought even one fair trade item per year, it would provide a year’s worth of work for one million people!

Become an abolitionist.  Knowing about modern day slavery and doing nothing about it helps no one but the traffickers.  So talk to others about it.  Refer them to websites like the Polaris Project, CNN’s Freedom Project, or the Not For Sale Campaign.  Help in any way you can to eradicate human trafficking

                BECAUSE NO ONE SHOULD BE FOR SALE.

Increasingly, we are aware of the healing power of natural foods, and of the destructive power of chemically laden, out-of-season foods that are grown to survive great shipping distances and long shelf lives.  In my last blog, I wrote of the rather sorry state of the conventional tomato industry, and I interviewed a professional chef who makes it a priority to use local, organic and fair trade products.

Dr. Jewel Sommerville

Following up on my interview with Chef Chris Oliveri of Worlds Fare Chef and Holistic Health Rhode Island, I seized the opportunity to interview Dr. Jewel Sommerville.  Dr. Sommerville is the founder of Holistic Health Rhode Island (www.holistichealthri.com), and is a Doctor of Acupuncture and East Asian Medicine.  East Asian Medicine (EAM) has been practiced – with good results – for more than 2,000 years, so I think it’s safe to say there’s something to this.  According to practitioners of EAM, the body should be in tune with the external environment, and this includes eating foods that are similar in nature to the external environment.

Dr. Sommerville commented that “food is medicine.  Everything we eat helps us or hinders us, and eating should be a conscious activity with awareness of how food choices impact energy level, immune system, neurological functioning, mood, and overall general health.  In East Asian Medicine, foods have flavors, colors, temperatures (meaning that the food either warms or cools the body internally), and many other characteristics that determine its suitability.”

Regarding seasonal foods, she said that “eating with the season has always been important.  Certain foods grow in certain seasons to aid us in our health, and certain foods grow in certain regions because they are needed or necessary in that region.  For example, a banana grows in tropical regions because it packs a lot of energy and cools the body.  This assists people in tropical areas to get through long, hot days with more energy, while simultaneously cooling the body.  Despite this, people in the Northeast, for example, will begin every day with a banana during the winter!  This actually cools the body when what is needed is to warm it internally in order to better cope with the cold outdoor temperatures.  Soups, stews, cooked root vegetables, hearty greens, whole grains – these are things we need in the winter – not foods cold in temperature or raw, and certainly no tropical foods when you live in a cold climate!”

Dr. Sommerville added that we should always strive for balance, warming internally when it is cold outside and vice versa.  She added that there are a few exceptions, though.  For instance, “when it is hot outdoors, one can eat SOME spicy food because this will cause the body to sweat, which then cools the body.  So, sometimes you can choose the same temperature for the season, but only for specific purposes – such as in the winter when one contracts a cold or flu with a high temperature.  Then we may use a combination of foods to first make the body sweat in order to cool the body, and then foods that cool internally and replenish lost fluids – something that may not be in season – cucumber, for example – but this is a special circumstance as well.”    

And here’s something for those of us who live in warmer climates and use air conditioning (and especially for those who keep the temperature “too low – low 60s, for example”).  Dr. Sommerville stated that “this alters which foods one should eat indoors in the summer.  We still need to cool the body, but not as much as those who, for instance, work outdoors.  Indoor summer folks with air conditioning can eat more neutral temperature foods, and maybe even slightly warm foods.”

I asked Dr. Sommerville which symptoms or conditions she might see in people who do not eat in accordance with the seasons.  She indicated that many health conditions can result when people do not eat according to the season and/or to their body constitution.  Some examples are “deficient immune systems (i.e. lots of colds, flus, becoming ill easily, chronic fatigue); inflammatory conditions such as arthritis, uterine problems, fibromyalgia; depression or general moodiness (especially if there are a lot of sugars and simple carbohydrates, like white pasta and potatoes, or processed foods in their diets); and fertility problems for both men and women.  Eating incorrectly for your body type and/or season can lead to a host of health problems; these are only a few examples.”

According to Dr. Sommerville, when people are willing to make real change in their diets, many positive effects can be seen “including, but not limited to, reduced pain, better and more stable moods, weight loss, pregnancy (after having had problems conceiving), better sleep, better memory, better concentration…the list goes on and on.”

Dr. Sommerville said that “all one needs to do to see how our insistence on eating non-seasonal as well as processed foods has impacted us is to look at the obesity level in our country, especially among the young.  Look at how many young people are taking prescription medications.  Look at your friends – how many are taking anti-depressants or are medicating other health issues?  The saddest thing is watching young people experiencing health problems that were once seen only in an aging population – things like high cholesterol, diabetes, reproductive concerns, etc.”

Dr. Sommerville closed by saying that “we cannot eat unconsciously any longer if we want to remain healthy and live our best lives.  Eating seasonal, non-processed, fresh foods is the first and best step.”

Thank you, Dr. Sommerville.  I’d say that pretty much sums it up, although I would add that those foods should also be slave-free  BECAUSE NO ONE SHOULD BE FOR SALE.

Dr. Sommerville received her degree from the New England School of Acupuncture (NESA), the oldest graduate school in the United States for the study of East Asian Medicine (EAM).  She is licensed to practice in both Massachusetts and Rhode Island, and holds the Diplomate of Acupuncture credential.  In addition to her clinical practice, she serves as part-time faculty at the New England School of Acupuncture, and has taught at Brown University.  Dr. Sommerville was honored to be the Master of Ceremonies at NESA’s Women’s Health Symposium in 2011, and often guest lectures on Women’s Health and Acupuncture Research.  She has written numerous articles, and has presented on topics ranging from stress to the role of complementary medicine in substance abuse recovery.  Questions?  You may email Dr. Sommerville at drjewel@holistichealthri.com.

First, it’s a story of profits.  Growers want to minimize bruising and maximize shelf life.  Frankly, their big concern ISN’T flavor.

But toxic?  Oh yeah.  Most of our “winter” tomatoes come from southwest Florida where, as you probably know, the land is essentially sand.  So how can so many tomatoes be grown in a medium so lacking in basic nutrients?  The answer is chemicals.  LOTS of chemicals — as in chemical fertilizers, pesticides, and herbicides.  The list used by Florida growers includes more than 100 of them.  So not only do these tomatoes have no flavor, they are chemical cocktails containing significantly less vitamin C, thiamin, niacin, and calcium than “healthy” tomatoes, and containing 14 times as much sodium as a tomato grown in the 1960s.

Even if you are not dissuaded by any of the above (How can that be?), we simply cannot ignore the human slavery factor.  Barry Estabrook, an investigative food journalist and author of the book Tomatoland puts it this way: “If you have ever eaten a tomato during the winter months, you have eaten a fruit picked by a slave.”  Yes, slaves – people who are bought and sold, retained against their will, beaten if they don’t work hard enough, and who are continually sprayed by highly toxic pesticides.  In Florida.  In America.  Come on, folks.  Do you really need to eat winter tomatoes THIS badly?  

But there is some good news here.  If you absolutely can’t live without tomatoes in the winter, stores like Whole Foods and, as of February 9, 2012, Trader Joes (supermarket chains participating in the “Fair Food Campaign”) sell organic tomatoes.  You can rest easy knowing that chemicals were NOT used – on the tomatoes or on the people picking them.  In warmer climes like North Carolina, some of our local growers can even supply us with these red beauties that have been sustainably grown in greenhouses.  Do they have the same great flavor as outdoor-grown, in-season tomatoes?  No, they do not.  But they are certainly a far more agreeable alternative to those tainted by slavery and chemicals.

While researching this topic, it occurred to me that chefs are in a unique position to influence our food choices and to effect real, positive change in the food industry.  Those with sufficient personal conviction to do so can use their status, celebrity, authority and influence to publicly state their commitment to and preference for organic produce, dolphin-free tuna, fair trade chocolate, and the like.  Seemed like a reasonable assumption on my part, so I decided to ask a chef!

I spoke with Chris Oliveri, a personal chef in Rhode Island, who operates under the name of Worlds Fare Chef (www.worldsfarechef.com).  Many of his clients are on special diets; others simply enjoy the convenience of coming home to healthy, creative and well prepared foods.  He also caters to both businesses and individuals.  Chris’ extensive background includes more than 20 years in the food service industry.  He trained with some the country’s top chefs, and also owned his own restaurant.  He has been a guest lecturer at Johnson & Wales University; is a member of the U.S. Personal Chef Association; and is a graduate of the Culinary Business Academy.  In 2010, he participated at the White House in Michelle Obama’s launch of her “Chefs Go To School” program.  He is also affiliated with Holistic Health Rhode Island (www.holistichealthri.com).  You can read more about him on either website.

I asked Chef Chris to what extent he incorporates seasonal foods into his menus, and whether he discourages his clients from eating out-of-season produce.  He responded that “It’s a subtle process.  I try to create menus based on local and seasonal foods.  In the case of dinner parties and catering, which are often booked several weeks or months in advance, I use calendars to create menus that are based on seasonally available local foods, and I include a disclaimer stating that the ingredients are based on seasonal availability, and that substitutions may be necessary.”  To ensure that he is offering creative and healthy foods while, at the same time, using organic and/or sustainably grown products, Chris says that he “starts with the date of the event and then determines seasonal availability, color, texture, and flavors.”  He says he chooses organic products whenever possible.  The process of sourcing his ingredients includes asking lots of questions of growers/vendors at markets and farms and, to a lesser degree, relying on published information, labeling, and the GoodGuide mobile app.

To ensure that his ingredients don’t include slave labor, he buys fair trade and local products whenever possible.  “In essence,” he says, “it’s a lot of label reading and referencing fair trade websites to find the best fair trade brands.  When possible, I try not to buy produce that is not in season locally and is not certified.”

Do his clients with different “food values” ever push back?  Sometimes.  He commented that “some clients simply don’t care, and feel that this “new” information is too much to handle.  But, with the more conscientious and open clients, the educational process is simple, as the client is already aware of the benefits of organic, local, and seasonal foods.”

According to Chef Chris, “apathy and frugality are usually the stumbling blocks that prevent a client from making the shift to sustainable and fairly traded ingredients.  But, in today’s ‘locavore’ environment, a lot of my clients have already begun to shift to a sustainability mentality.”

Finally, I asked Chef Chris how he would respond if one of his clients requested, in January, a menu that included salads with fresh tomatoes.  He said, “I would explain that tomatoes are not in season locally, and I will most likely not use them until the first local, organic crop comes to market.”

I’d say that qualifies as using one’s influence and personal conviction to state a commitment to healthy eating and slave-free foods.  Congratulations, Chef Chris!

Hooray for those fighting for farm workers’ rights (and some progress IS being made, thanks to groups like the Coalition of Immolakee Workers — www.ciw-online.org), and for those who are organically farming and paying their workers living wages.  Please support your local farmers’ markets if you can’t grow your own tomatoes.  Our local farmers are improving our lives by providing us healthy, lovingly cared for fruits and vegetables, and also by ensuring environmental sustainability.  We all win with delicious, nutritious foods grown and harvested with respect for the environment and for people.

Because NO ONE SHOULD BE FOR SALE.

 In my next blog — more on this topic from Dr. Jewel Sommerville, founder of Holistic Health Rhode Island (www.holistichealthri.com).

“Silence in the face of injustice is complicity with the oppressor.”  Ginetta Sagan

Eleven years later, children are being trafficked, beaten, nearly starved, kept out of school, not paid, and generally being deprived of their human rights.  Somehow, chocolate doesn’t seem so sweet or appealing against this backdrop.  

So who cares?  Well, apparently not the folks at companies like Hershey’s, Nestlé, Kraft Foods, Godiva, etc., etc. – you know the names.

“He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it. He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it.”  M. L. King

But there are companies that DO care – companies that ensure the integrity of their supply chains.  I’ve mentioned a couple of them in earlier blogs: Theo Chocolate (which also happens to be the only organic, fair trade bean-to-bar factory in the U.S.) and Divine Chocolate.  Thank goodness, they aren’t the only ones .  Equal Exchange, Shaman Chocolates, Green & Black’s, Taza Chocolates, and Alter Eco Chocolates are just part of the growing list of companies putting people over profits.  I am grateful for their ethical business practices, and hope that one day ALL chocolate companies will follow suit.

Meanwhile, when you’re shopping for Valentine’s Day treats, please look for the fair trade certification symbol on the packages.  It matters a lot.  What if it were your child – kidnapped, trafficked, beaten, and forced to work for nothing but subsistence-level food and shelter?  Well, these kids are all someone’s children.  And if flowers are included in your Valentine’s Day gift-giving plans, please don’t forget to look for – and ask for — fair trade flowers.  Oh, and here’s Fair Trade USA’s new logo, which you will begin to see soon.

Will you spend a bit more on organic, fair trade chocolate?  Sure, but these are children’s lives we’re talking about.  And they’re worth a few extra dollars, aren’t they?

When you purchase chocolate that is not fairly traded, you are voting for child slavery. 

And that’s just not okay…

                 BECAUSE NO ONE SHOULD BE FOR SALE.

What can we do to “be the change we wish to see?”  

•  Stay informed – sign up to receive updates from an anti-trafficking organization, such as the Polaris Project – www.polarisproject.org

• Encourage lawmakers to enact and enforce anti-trafficking legislation.  (And kudos to the state of California for its recently enacted California Transparency Supply Chain Act, aimed at eliminating global forced labor.  Companies with $100 million or more per year in sales must describe the extent to which they verify risks of human trafficking and conduct independent and surprise audits of their suppliers.  They must also disclose whether they require suppliers to certify that the materials they use comply with laws regarding human trafficking and slavery, and whether employees receive training to reduce the risk of slavery.  The new law directly affects about 3,200 companies doing business or headquartered in California, but impacts a very large number of supplier companies.)

• Buy fair trade products

• Be an informed consumer by finding out where products come from and the conditions of those who make them before you buy.

• Volunteer with an anti-trafficking group or organization

• Donate to an anti-trafficking organization

• Fund raise

• Attend an event

• Report suspected human trafficking

• Spread the word to get more people involved

   Working together, we can and must eliminate human trafficking –

                  BECAUSE NO ONE SHOULD BE FOR SALE.

In the Talmud, Akiba is admonished by his rabbi for worrying that he will die a failure; for not having lived a life like Moses.  But his rabbi reminds him that God will not judge him for not being like Moses; rather, God will judge him for not being Akiba.  Brilliant.  And isn’t this what living with integrity really is?   It’s about being ourselves; about bringing to the world the gifts within us – love, compassion, joy, and our own unique talents.  It’s about accepting and respecting ourselves, warts and all, and about extending that same acceptance and respect to others.

Stacy Charter says it this way: “There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout: This is me damn it!  I look the way I look; think the way I think; feel the way I feel; love the way I love.  I am a whole complex package.  Take me or leave me.   Accept me or walk away.  Do not try to make me feel like less of a person just because I don’t fit your idea of who I should be, and don’t try to change me to fit your mold.  If I need to change, I alone will make that decision.”   

Wow – not easy to do in a society that rewards compliance.  And this is not about going through life like a bull in a china shop.  Rather, it is about not pretending to be people we aren’t (usually to please someone else).  It is about really accepting ourselves as we are, knowing that we are works in progress; knowing that the work is never done; knowing that we must follow our own paths – our own moral compasses, regardless of what others may think.  It’s a tall order, but absolutely worth the effort because, until we fully love ourselves, accept ourselves, and feel compassion for ourselves, we cannot extend these attitudes toward others.  A half-filled cup cannot runneth over.  And surely, without self-love and self-acceptance, we cannot live lives of integrity – lives in which our beliefs, words and actions all line up, making it possible for us to do what we believe is “right,” regardless of the consequences.

If you – or someone you know – has spent a lot of time attempting to live up to others’ expectations, you know how that approach to life drains us, to the point that we may actually forget who we really are.  Repeatedly saying “yes” when we really want to say “no” is exhausting in its insidious erosion of our true essence.  Neither should we be always saying “no” when we really want to say “yes” to those activities that stir our souls.  Both are denials of our true nature and compromises of our integrity.

 “Be yourself.  Then you are going to be really unique and exciting.  People are going to beat a path to your door if you polish your inner self.”       —–Robert D. Ballard

And wouldn’t our relationships be so much more enjoyable – so much less WORK – if we could all relate to one another from this place of personal authority?  I am blessed to know people who really live this philosophy, and it is a joy to be around them.  No second-guessing what they really want; what they really mean; who they really are.  And it doesn’t matter if they are at work, at home with their families, or socializing with friends.  They simply are who they are.

  “This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.”    —–William Shakespeare

So many people are afraid to express their true natures – afraid they won’t be accepted; afraid they don’t measure up; afraid to really live, despite the fact that those who really love us would never expect or ask us to be anyone but who we really are.  With compassion, let’s embrace the uniqueness and the beauty that lies within each and every one of us, and remind one another – over and over — that we are enough, just as we are.  Do it for someone else.  Do it for you.

   Because the world really needs people of integrity.

Metanoia. I stumbled across the word several years ago, and fell in love with the sound and the “feel” of it. Derived from the Greek word metanoiein, it means to change one’s mind; to repent; to transform. The transformation referred to is an inner transformation; a change of consciousness. Viewing this change of consciousness from a global perspective, it appears that our time – our metanoia – may be on the horizon.

Much has been written about the changes predicted for our world in 2012. While some of these predictions might be considered “dire,” others are more in line with a positive view of the world and of the inherent good of people. As someone who believes that we manifest that on which we focus, I choose to rely on the latter type of prediction, knowing that transforming our world will only require that sufficient numbers of us choose peace over violence; love over hate and greed; freedom over slavery; and the common good over individual gain.

Seeds have been planted in 2010. Individuals and groups are taking stands and taking action. Groups like Anonymous; Occupy Wall Street; and Change.org are but a few of 2011’s standouts. While you may not always agree with their methods, there is no question that they (we) are having an impact. Movements such as these have not been seen for decades. Clearly, their time has come, and the momentum is building. We are fed up with the status quo; we are taking action; and our actions are producing results.

“We must not wish for the disappearance of our troubles but for the grace to transform them.”
—–Simone Weil

Each of us has a standing invitation to participate in this transformation. Individually and collectively, we are being called to “be the change we wish to see.” So choose your cause; follow your heart; and take a stand. Let’s make 2012 the year when, finally, great numbers of us act together to effect the metanoia needed for a world that will be a joy to live in now and to leave to future generations.

“How lovely to think that no one need wait a moment, we can start now, start slowly changing the world! How lovely that everyone, great and small, can make their contribution toward introducing justice straightaway. . . . And you can always, always give something, even if it is only kindness!”
—– Anne Frank

     HAPPY NEW YEAR!!